Why Your Brand Sounds Like a 1990’s Voicemail (And How to Fix It!)

Introduction: The Brand Personality Dilemma 🎭

Have you ever been to a networking event where everyone sounds exactly the same? Or online, trying to get through to an agent - only to end up with a chatbot that sounds exactly the same no matter what site you are on? 

 That's what most businesses sound like online - a monotonous sea of sentences out of the box. But what if I told you that your brand could be the quirky, sarcastic voice everyone wants to talk to? What if your messages were opened and shared by your subscribers because they are unique, useful and entertaining?

The Shocking Truth About Brand Consistency

Here's a mind-blowing fact: B2B emails outperform B2C emails by almost double the click-through rates. But here's the catch - this only works if people actually remember and trust you. That doesn’t happen if your website says one thing, your social page says another and your welcome message a third. It’s not even the information! It's the way you say it.

Your brand is EVERYTHING your business does. From invoices to phone calls, from chatbots to email signatures - every single interaction tells a story.

The Meerkat Method: Learning from Compare the Market 🐾

Let's talk about a brand that nailed its personality: Compare the Market. They're so consistent that when you hear their squeaky meerkat voice, you instantly know it's them - without even seeing their logo!

Key Takeaway: Be So Distinctive, People Can Recognize You Blindfolded

📢

Developing Your Brand Voice: The Practical Playbook

1. Pick Your Persona

• Choose ONE ideal customer to speak to. 
• Create a voice that's like a magnet (attracting some, repelling others)
• Think Marmite: Love it or hate it, but never ignore it

2. Consistency is Your Superpower

As one marketer put it: "Consistency in brand is like wearing matching socks. It shows you've got your act together."

3. Practical Brand Voice Guidelines

• Choose your style words. For example, do you swear, use slang or tease your subscribers?
• Don’t be afraid to use sarcasm (if it fits)
• Always end on a high note
• Create a "brand voice menu" anyone on your team can follow

The ROI Reality Check 💰

Marketing channels are evolving. Email marketing still delivers an average of £35 for every £1 spent. But today, it's not just about email - think chat, SMS, WhatsApp, push notifications. Your audience don’t think in terms of channels and touchpoints. They think in terms of “Susie from Waymo who helped me.” The channel is secondary to the service.

The Side-kick Brand Voice Challenge

For a small business, the brand voice is you. But what happens if you don’t want your face to be out there? Or if you are a growing team, with employees or freelancers on the payroll?

That’s where you need a brand side-kick. For example, Clap-Trap from Borderlands, the meerkats from Compare The Market or Genie from Aladdin. Their voices are so memorable that you can identify them with your eyes closed, or by reading their dialogue on the page. Whilst the main character (that’s you!) runs around delivering the service, the side-kick is doing a beautiful job of telling people what is happening. 

Can you create a "Clap Trap" for your business? A character so distinctive that people eagerly anticipate your messages, check out it’s latest clips or log onto your website to talk to it, in chat?

Boring is the New Invisible

In a world drowning in content, being forgettable is the real business killer. Your brand voice is your secret weapon. With 100+ messages a day in the inbox, you need your audience to recognise and anticipate what you offer.

Next Steps

1. Decide who you want to talk to. Not “30-year-old managers in London.” You want “Derek from Wimbledon who wants to get promoted, eats cookies at the gym and loves Deadpool jokes.” Be specific about their pain points, humour, values and time crunches. Know how they consume information and when.
2. Decide who will be your brand voice. Is it you or your sidekick? What marks them out? Makes them unique? Makes them happy, angry, amused or sad? What are their keywords? You can try back-and forth conversations (out loud is best) or even write up a dating profile for them. Anything to get you started - the brand voice will solidify over time.
3. Create simple voice guidelines. I’m not joking about a “voice menu.” The quicker and easier it is for your team to understand, the quicker it will be adopted across all your communications.
4. Identify and roll it out to all your channels. This will be more gradual, but look at using it on:

• Your landing pages
• Your website
• Your ad banners
• Your pop-ups
• Your Chat
• Your Helpdesk
• SMS, WhatsApp, Voxer
• Any videos
• Any social comments
• Any workbooks
• Any courses
• Any infographics
• Your email footer
• Your invoice footer

Once it is embedded, it becomes second nature. 

Good luck!